September
by Lidsworth
Summary: Kaneki has finally reached his breaking point, and Hide is left to pick up his many pieces.
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Kaneki has finally lost himself, and Hide is left to pick up the pieces.

A/N: This is based off of one of my favorite songs by Daughtry, "September". It's heavy with angst, so I hope you still can enjoy it. Like always, I'm my own Beta, so there may be mistakes.

Disclaimer: I don't own Tokyo Ghoul.

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They kept him chained up like an animal in order to prevent him from hurting other living beings, or possibly himself. But he still found away around the latter. Every day it seemed as if another scratch mark had etched its way into his bruised skin, or that his white scrubs had been torn or stained with spots of rusting blood.

He'd lost more color than ever, if that was even possible, and time and near starvation had traded his muscular body for a thin, tiny frail one. Hide assumed that had his hair been dark once more, that it would have turned a deathly white due to the conditions he'd been forced to live through. But someone else had already beaten the CCG to that.

Hide supposed he should be somewhat grateful.

The CCG was the only reason he was still alive, though "alive" wasn't the correct term anymore, was it? _Dead_ alive was more like it. Because while Kaneki's ghoulish body was still alive, keeping him aware and living like some broken train huffing with a wheeze "I think I can. I think I can. I think I can..." his soul, however, had fluttered away the minute that Amon had been unable to kill him, and instead had decided to take him to HQ.

"At least you can see him whenever you like," Mado had tried her best to add a light sense of humor to the gloomy moment, but the way she utilized her tone when speaking of Kaneki made the ghoul seem like some sort of feral, rabid animal. It did little to alleviate Hide's unease.

And now, as Hide walked into his white padded room with the nimbleness of a butterfly, he supposed that Kaneki _had_ become some sort of feral, rabid animal. His eyes found the sickly figure in the corner of the room.

What he'd been doing in the corner of the room before, Hide wasn't entirely sure, but he had been turned away, crouched on the ground and mumbling something to himself.

Upon Hide's slow entrance, the mumbling had stopped and the body had become incredibly stiff. The keys dangled on Hide's waste, and a plastic bag crunched on his side as he continued to walk into the room.

"Hey Kaneki! What's up, I brought you something," Hide stopped and knelt to the ground, slowly and cautiously, "Come on, you'll like it!"

The ghoul turned one red eye at the blond, and with shared caution , began to crawl towards Hide. Blood stained his clothing, and Hide could see areas around his arm where he'd torn at the flesh. _Remind Amon that he needs to be cleaned and some fed later, _Hide told himself.

The chains around his hand and feet clanged against one another as he crawled, and to ease his actions, Hide tossed the plastic back towards him.

Hooded eyes looked wearily at the blond, than back down at the bag. Boney hands reached into the plastic, and slowly, pulled out the thick, rectangular object.

Hide held his breath while anticipation welled up within him.

The ghoul traced his dark finger nailed hands over the geometric object. It opened with a crack that all new books had about them whenever they were first opened. Delicately, he turned the pages with the tips of his fingers, looking at the words, and for a split second, Hide believed that Kaneki was soaking them in.

However, his hopes were quickly crushed when the ghoul turned towards him with a hungry look in his eyes.

"F..food" He whispered as the book fell to the ground and was promptly stepped over, "Food!"

"No man! I'm not food," Hide tried to sound optimistic, _tried _to make it seem like his friend mistaking him for a juicy steak was an accident, but the sadness and anger associated with the moment was very hard to push back, "It's me, Hide! Your best friend."  
And now Kaneki was on his two feet, stumbling,but moving at an incredibly fast rate towards Hide.

But the chains yanked at his limbs, they stopped him from going any further, and unfortunately gave him an opportunity to think logically.

It was as if something clicked in his brain.

"H-Hide isn't f-food!" It was a painful wail that bounced off of the walls, and tore itself into Hide's brain like white hot blades stabbing into tender flesh. It hurt. "He's a friend! He's my friend!"  
He buried his hands in his white hair and tugged at the thin strands. Calming the ghoul could get Hide bitten, the dull marks on his arm remained a perfect reminder of just what Kaneki was capable of.

So unfortunately, he watched as Kaneki's fingers ripped at white locks of his hair.

As quickly as the self mutilation began, it ended.

With inhuman speed, the ghoul had maneuvered itself back into the corner of the room, wailing to itself, and rocking back and forth.

Hide stood and walked over to the book. He opened the pages and began to read aloud.

"When he woke, he was no longer one with the physical realm, rather..."

As he read, the wailing stopped, and the rocking ceased completely. Hide had gotten too deep into the book to realize that his friend had fallen asleep at the sound of his soothing voice at, and though the book grew incredibly morbid and freaking depressing, he willed himself to continue until he was certain that his friend had fallen into a steady, uneventful sleep.

This is how it had been for a year, and honestly, as long as Kaneki was being fed and cared for, Hide didn't mind. Kaneki didn't want any of this power or insanity, he _wanted _to die after he nearly got eaten by Rize. But things went for too long, and it had destroyed him. At least here, he was safe.

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I'm working on a new chapter of Helping Hand, but I wanted to get this idea out. Depending on the feedback, i'll either continue or leave it like this. I love TG, and I'm planning on writing a lot more. Anyway, hope you enjoyed, have a wonderful week and God bless!


	2. Chapter 2

Hide never spoke to any of the other CCG investigators if he didn't have to. Their opinions of him and his affiliations with an insane ghoul were made _very _clear, especially when they all at once moved away from him in the cafeteria, or when they purposely ignored him in the hallway when he made to greet one of them, or when they neglected to help him whenever he carried pounds of papers and reports in sore arms.

Part of him wondered when they would start tripping him in the hallways, or start slamming this lunch tray on his shirt.

Working as an assistant at the CCG headquarters sucked. It was high school all over again, but worse, it was adults. Hide took to eating alone or in the coffee lounge, where the stench of coffee was so great, no one wanted to eat in there, and no one really had the time.

He had attempted to eat in Kaneki's room, but the ghoul got a hold of his burger and tried to eat it, and unfortunately, ended up barfing the entire thing on himself and the white sheets on his bed.

So the coffee lounge it was.

With a sigh, Hide walked into the heavily scented room, and placed his small lunch on the table in the center of the room. He looked at the coffee maker, and seeing that it was on, decided to fix himself a cup of the steaming caffeine. He figured he could bring Kaneki a cup, as the CCG often went days or even weeks without feeding him. And it wasn't like the knowledge that he was sneaking his friend cups of coffee went unnoticed, Amon just constantly turned a blind eye towards the action.

So he walked over to the coffee maker, and touched the handle. It was slightly warm, warmer then usual.

_Someone must have been here minutes ago, _he thought to himself as he searched for a mug in the counters above. After he found one, he placed the mug on the counter, grabbed the glass coffee pitcher, and began to pour the dark,bitter liquid into mug. After short while, he debated on whether he should put some sort of sugar or cream into the murkiness, but decided against it. Kaneki took it black anyway.

"So you take your coffee black, then?"

Quickly, he turned on his heel, and was met with the stoic figure of the bleached headed Arima standing in the door way. That man had taken a sudden interest in Hide's actions ever since he caught wind of his connection with the wayward ghoul.

"I ugh..I mean-"  
"Is it for Ken Kaneki?"

Hide's appetite chose that exact moment to dissolve into nothingness.

True, Arima's victims were all ghouls, but still, he was a killer none the less. And anyone who could kill someone, or _something _that remotely resembled an actual human being sent Hide's hairs on edge. The man was an emotionless killer.

"Um...sorry Arima-san, you must want to use the coffee maker," Hide changed the subject as he grabbed the warm mug, and at the same time, Arima walked into the lounge. With the mug pressed tightly against him, Hide ducked away from Arima, and quickly walked out of the lounge.

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He took to letting Kaneki off of his chains as of recent. The ghoul, though cautions of Hide's presence, had taken a slight liking to him after the books and the cups of coffee. It turned out that Kaneki enjoyed having books read to him. Whether it was the tone or the story (could Kaneki even comprehend words anymore), there seemed to be something about the books that settled the ghoul down.

Presently, Hide placed the mug of coffee on the floor, and from beside the bed, the white haired ghoul peered out from his hiding place.

"Hey man, brought you something!" Hide tapped his foot by steaming mug, "Come on, drink it before-"

Kaneki's thin figure was already inspecting the mug before Hide could finish his sentence. Cold fingers wrapped around the mug, and slowly, lifted the mug to his chapped lips. Like a child taking in long gulps of milk, Kaneki began to swallow the steamy contents.

He was done within seconds, and the mug lay on the floor, it's contents empty. Next, Kaneki found Hide's sneakers to be quite interesting. He began to trace around the shoe laces, and began to tug on the fabric, and next, he fingers crawled up onto his pants, and tugged at the cloth.

"They're pants Kaneki!" He ruffled the white locks, and the ghoul, already accustomed to his friends awkward advances, continued to investigate the pants.

He knew that Kaneki remembered absolutely nothing, and when he did, the memories caused him pain. So for what it was worth, he didn't mind his friend tugging on his pants like a curious monkey, not in the least.

After Hide's inspection, the blond looked towards the wall of the room, where a stack of books had accumulated. Hide smiled as he walked over towards them, and pulled one from the stack. Over the months, Hide had bought a rather large collection of books for his friend. Kaneki loved all of them, or at least that's what his body language told Hide. He was always so attentive, so engrossed in the text and the plot, at least that's what Hide liked to think.

Or maybe it was just an awesome way of putting Kaneki to sleep.

So like always, Hide fell to the ground, opened a book, and began to read. Kaneki crawled very close to him, still cautious, yet not entirely guarded. As the words buzzed from Hide's lips, and each page turn made a "flip" noise that somehow soothed the ghoul, Kaneki found himself leaning against the human, peering over his shoulder and at the pages.  
Hide smiled as Kaneki became immersed within the story, even to the point of trying to turn the pages himself.

"Not yet Kaneki, I haven't gotten..." Hide trailed off as he noticed an imperfection at the top corner of the page. With an raised eyebrow, he touched the crinkled 'dog-eared' page.

Why on earth was it dog eared? Hide hadn't picked up this book in ages, let alone, he hadn't gotten this far.

The ghoul beside him seemed to calm down slightly as his friend traced his finger around the bookmarked page. Kaneki rested his head on Hide's shoulder. Meanwhile, Hide pondered on the page.

There was no one else coming in here, as far as Hide knew, so who the hell was bookmarking pages.

"K-Kaneki...have you been reading?" He asked, slightly appalled .

The ghoul didn't respond, he only remained silent, extremely silent.

"Kaneki, tell me, have you been reading?" Repeated Hide, as he continued to flip through the pages, as a result, being met with more dog ears. The ghoul said nothing, and Hide figured it would stay like that.

So he was partly when Kaneki did start speaking.

It was quiet at first, barely inaudible. But it was there nonetheless.

"H-Hide" Came the whisper, a small, helpless whisper, "Help me."

Somehow, their position had been altered so that Hide's hands were on Kaneki's arms as the human stared the ghoul in the face. Kaneki's red eye glowed brightly, while the other stared at his friend with tears.

"P-please, they-"  
The door had been open for some time, and it had taken Hide a while to notice an actual being standing in the door way. But after a brief moment of silence, and the shuffling of feet against the floor, Hide turned around just in time to see who it was.

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Sorry for the long wait, and just so you know, I'm not dropping my other two Tokyo Ghoul stories. School has started, and it's just been hard to write. I actually have a new chapter written for What We Lose, but unfortunately, it's been lost in my documents so I have to dig it up or just start over. I'm still working on Helping Hand, though i've been at odds with it lately. But yeah, I haven't dropped anything. As usual, I own nothing, and I am my own beta, so there will be mistakes! Please tell me what you think, have a wonderful weekend, and God bless!


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